Turf: The annals of some monopolous service provider.
Participant: One of the most sexually desperate people on Earth, also known as a "man" but we'll call him Mr.Nasty.
Agent 001: This one gets kinda gross, you've now been warned.
(Once inside the Bug Jar...)
Mr.Nasty: HI THERE
Agent 001: What's this room all about?
Mr.Nasty: BULL SHIT
(A charming fellow.)
Agent 001: No, the question was not, what are all chat rooms about... It was what's this particular one all about?
Mr.Nasty: SORRY IT'S ABOUT YOU. YOU WANT SOMETHING YOU WANT TO TALK
Agent 001: Well, yeah. I was just wondering what the name of the room was.
Mr.Nasty: TALK DIRTY TO ME
Agent 001: Didn't you just go in there asking for girl's pictures?
Mr.Nasty: YOU WANT TO TALK
Agent 001: Of course.
Mr.Nasty: YOU SOUNDED LIKE A PRUNE
Agent 001: A prune?
Mr.Nasty: YES ARE YOU LOOKING FOR ADVENTURE?
Agent 001: What kind of an analogy is that?
Agent 001: I see. So didn't you want a girl's picture?
Mr.Nasty: THAT WAS THE REQUEST WASN'T IT? TRADE??
Agent 001: Sure. You first.
Mr.Nasty: I FELL FOR THAT LAS WEEK
(There's a surprise.)
Agent 001: Fine, me first, but you better not be lying.
Mr.Nasty: OK NOSHIT WAIT IN WITH A HARD ON
(He's like a poet isn't he?)
Agent 001: How old are you?
Mr.Nasty: 21 U
Agent 001: Your profile says you've been divorced.
Agent 001: When did you marry?
Mr.Nasty: YOU WANT TO MARRY ME?
Agent 001: Yeah, that's right, I want to marry you. Check your mail box.
Agent 001: It's not the best shot, but it's fine for now.
(I sent him a picture of a prior female Bug Jar participant. I am such a jerk.)
Mr.Nasty: YOUR CUITE NOW WAIT WILL SEND NOW. GOT ON OF YOU NAKED I HAVE ONE OF ME
Agent 001: Send it over and we'll see. I went first last time, so it's your turn...
Mr.Nasty: I CAN DO MY DICK ON THE SCANNER WANT TO SEE
(Alright, that's it. This is where we are folks. For me this one line sums up modern technological progress and the implications on society pretty well: "I can do my dick on the scanner, want to see?")
Mr.Nasty: GIVE ME A MINUTE OK
Agent 001: I can't wait too long...
(Because I'm going to puke...)
Mr.Nasty: YOU CAN SEN A BETTER PIC WHILE
Agent 001: Ah ah... You know the trade.
Mr.Nasty: CAN YOU GIVE ME A MINUTE
Agent 001: What's taking so long?
Mr.Nasty: GIVE ME TIME I WILL NOT DISSAPOINT YU
Agent 001: Well what's the hold up? What's your name by the way?
Mr.Nasty: I DO WANT TO GIVE ME A SEC
Agent 001: I've given you so much much "secs" already that i'm surprised you haven't passed out. Get to it or I'm off in one minute. And what's your name?
Agent 001: Wow. Creative parents.
Mr.Nasty: SCANNING NOW
Agent 001: Yeah, you've been scanning for five minutes. You know you don't have to scan at 300 dpi.
Mr.Nasty: COMING NOW
Agent 001: I'll bet.
Mr.Nasty: YOU THERE
Agent 001: Yeah, sorry, I must have drifted off...
Mr.Nasty: LOOK IN MAIL WAS I BSING?
(No he was not "B.S.ing"... And I wish he had been. I quickly dispensed with the lad after this. If you'd like to see the results of modern technological progress when put in the hands of the everyday pervert, click here - but i caution you, this is far from tasteful or impressive.)