Jonathan Dy
So I was at school the other day... and to my surprise, the first class I had that morning was conveniently canceled (And to your surprise, I actually went to school, right?).

  When I use the term morning, I'm talking BEFORE 12:00 noon, a part of the day I came to know of this semester. I was up a little earlier than that though. I awoke at 6:00 AM and had the class at 8:45 that morn.

  So, I get to class, sit down for some pre-class meditation and all of a sudden realize that it's 5 minutes before class was to commence and there are only 3 peoples in class with me. Some guy, before coming into class, glances at a note posted up on the wall and seems somewhat surprised, then disapproving, then pissed off, all in one progression of facial expressions.

  Shocked, he enters the class room and says to me "It's fuckin' canceled man!" as if I'm the one who canceled the class. I think I was more pissed at his tone of voice than the class being canceled.

  Okay, now I had an hour and fifteen minutes to kill off... So I sat down and spilled coffee on myself. This spillage was, however, very peculiar. At first I spilled some on the newspaper, relieved that none had gone on myself... until I felt a wet sensation on my arm. Minor spill, nothing to the extent of an EXXON spill or a Dy spill. Then I spilled some again but this time, when I spilled it, I thought for sure that I'd get some on my pants and/or my sweater... guess what folks, NO coffee spillage was found anywhere in the vacinity of my pantellions. I got away scott free!

  I think this experience of mine was part of what we call the Twilight Zone. Boy that coffee was magical! I went to my next class and got screwed into buying a used textbook from this guy who I thought was named Michael. It turns out his name was really Mayco as my caller ID was to reveal to me in a call he placed to my residence. I musta called him Michael 10 times. Nevertheless, I got swindled into buying his book for 20 dollars less than the price of a new book.

  "Eet ees brand niew" Mayco says to me in his accent from regions unknown.

  I get home and open the book and surprise, surprise, there are highlited paragraphs. I'm not talking highlited words, important terms or phrases, I'm talking whole paragraphs, covering whole pages being highlighted. I guess he just thought it looked preettee.

  Mayco... I can't believe you man! Within days of that purchase, coffee was spilled on many a highlighted page. You think you'd learn.