How to Make Your Own Furby

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We responded by immediately leaving the store. As you can clearly see, the Furby and Beanie industry has driven this man over the edge. He will no longer look at a stuffed doll the same way anymore. Apparently these Furbies don't ever shut off. You have to take the batteries out if you want it to shut up. I see it more as a $200 annoyance than anything else.

How to make your own Furby:

Go to your nearest store and buy these following items:

1) Cotton balls... the more, the bigger your Furby will be. ($1)

2) Furry fabric... choose any colour, make it original. Fact: No two Furbies are alike you know? ($10)

3) Two buttons... for the eyes. If you wish, you may buy as many eyes as you wish, the thing will still be worth hundreds. ($0.50/pair)

4) Old Gremlins memorabilia... you need to know what it's supposed to look like. ($5)

5) Thread... according to two old ladies I overheard at a coffee shop, thread is difficult to find these days. if no thread is found proceed to step 6. ($4)

6) Scotch tape... I figure, what the hey, it'll be worth about two-hunny no matter what you use the way the Furby market is going nowadays. ($0.79, they're on sale now... apparently 'Tis the season to buy Scotch tape)

Follow these easy steps and you'll have your very own home-made Furby in no time:

1) With Furry fabric and cotton balls, make a ball and stick two buttons to make eyes. And there you have your Furby head.

2) Repeat step one but make bigger ball and don't attach buttons, unless of course you want some kinda funky Furby.

3) Scotch tape the two balls that you just made together. If you wish, you may tape hair that has fallen off your cat onto the head of the Furby for a hairier affect.

4) stick it in a cardboard box and make sure NOBODY touches it. It is now considered a mint condition Furby and every touch will reduce its value by $50 (or so the Furby 'pros' believe).

Ladies and Gents, I present to you your first home-made Furby at an economically efficient cost of $21.29 plus tax (additional buttons may be purchased for super-eyed Furby, or extra cotton may be bought for fat-ass Furby effect).

  Seriously people, let's relax on the toy crazes okay? I'm just hoping that when I have kids, whether it's in 10 years, 20 years, 30 years or never, there aren't any Furbies or Beanie Babies lying around because if my son or daughter start asking me to buy them $200 stuffed Gremlin look-alikes or $999 flimsy hand-sized bears, I might be forced to disown them. When it comes down to it, I think I can ignore a selfish kid crying about some insanely expensive doll he/she didn't get, easier than the fact that I spent half the value of my car on some doll I coulda made for $21.29 plus tax. And for those of youz who are in any way offended by this piece I have just written and wish to give me a piece of your mind, get a life!


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